The Art of Honouring Self-Determination
“She really needs to go to a nursing home, but she won’t go willingly, and my father is not taking a stand on this with her. I’m worried about the strain this will have on him.”
I vividly remember this phone conversation with Dianne* years ago as she was talking about her father and stepmother who lived across the country. Dianne was with them for her semi-annual visit and was telling me how she was attempting to convince her stepmother that staying in her home was too difficult for her father to handle.
A tinkling bell sounded in my thoughts. At that time, Dianne was a guiding oversight to my efforts to finalize the writing of the MHCC Peer Support Guidelines. These guidelines represent the wisdom . . .
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* The name has been changed.
I vividly remember this phone conversation with Dianne* years ago as she was talking about her father and stepmother who lived across the country. Dianne was with them for her semi-annual visit and was telling me how she was attempting to convince her stepmother that staying in her home was too difficult for her father to handle.
A tinkling bell sounded in my thoughts. At that time, Dianne was a guiding oversight to my efforts to finalize the writing of the MHCC Peer Support Guidelines. These guidelines represent the wisdom . . .
Click here to view the whole article.
* The name has been changed.
Making a Connection: How Do You Accomplish That?
I recently listened to Melinda Gate’s audiobook, The Moment of Lift: How Empowering Women Changes the World, and found it quite thought provoking. Near the end she infers that when we are unable (or unwilling) to ‘be’ with another person’s pain, we are in fact marginalizing them and contributing to their feeling of being alone in their struggle. That might not be the intent, but in her opinion, it is the result.
Personally, I had never thought of it that way before, but it makes a lot of sense. She tells the story of a person who needed to leave the room while a woman spoke of her painful and disturbing life story. Melinda could see that the demeanour of the woman sharing her story changed when the other person left. It was as if the woman became more alone in her pain as she sensed that the other person could not be with her as she shared it.
As peer supporters, we intrinsically understand how helpful it can be to listen and ‘be’ with another. That is one of the reasons that peer support works. Feeling alone in our struggle is an often-stated symptom of mental health illness – peer supporters offer empathy and support as a person travels their path of recovery. Peer supporters help another person to not feel alone in their pain.
Click here to view the whole article.
Personally, I had never thought of it that way before, but it makes a lot of sense. She tells the story of a person who needed to leave the room while a woman spoke of her painful and disturbing life story. Melinda could see that the demeanour of the woman sharing her story changed when the other person left. It was as if the woman became more alone in her pain as she sensed that the other person could not be with her as she shared it.
As peer supporters, we intrinsically understand how helpful it can be to listen and ‘be’ with another. That is one of the reasons that peer support works. Feeling alone in our struggle is an often-stated symptom of mental health illness – peer supporters offer empathy and support as a person travels their path of recovery. Peer supporters help another person to not feel alone in their pain.
Click here to view the whole article.